Ticking Bomb

Ticking Bomb

When Máxima was still hospitalized, her room mates changed most of the time. They are also heart kids. From newborns to kids, they come and go. Either they get better and could go home or worse so they had to move to ICU.

There were these two toddlers; one a two-year-old girl and one a three-year-old boy. They both had their third open heart surgery and it was supposed to be the last one. Their case is also almost similar to Máxima but Máxima has more complex defect. When Máxima is around two or three years old, she would also have her last open heart surgery and hopefully would be her last surgery of all.

The girl grew up healthy and after her last open heart surgery, her life changed. The surgery was not succeed and she got brain damaged. She was not like this before, said the mother to me. My heart was broken when she told me. I tried very hard to keep my tears from falling.

The other boy just had his last open heart surgery. The surgery went well but his body fluid keeps coming out so much longer than expected. He used to get two drainages but then the doctors add more. He stayed in the same room with Máxima for a couple days only and he had to back to ICU. His parents and big sister live with us in Ronald McDonald House. Her big sister played a lot with Marsha and we are quite close to his parents. Last night we heard from his mother that he has not been better, it is getting worse and today he will have another surgery. Big chance that they will lose him said the mother. I was very sad to hear the news. I am praying the surgery went well and he will recover and go home soon.

Every day I worry about Máxima’s next open heart surgery. I know it is still two or three years from now but hearing the unsuccessful stories makes me even more worry. I am afraid I will loose her..loose our old Máxima. As a Christian, I know I should not be worry about the future. I always tell myself to just enjoy every moment with her. I do enjoy being with her but I cannot get my fear out. Having a kid like Máxima is like having a ticking bomb waiting to go off. You do not know until how old she can be. You do not know if the doctors will manage to “defuse the bomb” or not. Wouldn’t you be worry when you have to hold an active bomb in your hand?



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